What made you stop being an addict?

Now I have the mental fortitude to face life's every day battles.

And I DID IT EVERYDAY

Now how do you quit your addiction?

A 2.6-Million-Pound Rock Thrown Inland… by a Monster Wave - The Daily Galaxy

So I thought had unlocked a new potential in life. I was doing it even if I don't feel the urge. I forced the urge to come by watching pornography.

I did it in my administrator's office.

I made sure I downloaded every video that was nice for me. This took almost the whole day.

Latest AirPods Pro 2 feature is ahead of its time in the best way - 9to5Mac

Around age 9 I discovered pornography through my uncle, he had left the CD in the video player in the night after enjoying himself.

Now I know I have all the nice videos on my phone, the rest I don't have, are not nice. So I had to start watching them one after the other. Some of them were even 2 hours long but I made sure I watched every little bit of it.

Is masturbation and p*rn bad?

Nvidia, Other Chip Stocks Slide Amid Worries About US-China Trade Tensions - Investopedia

I secretly kept on watching and watching until I got 19. At this time, I had started feeling the urge to ejaculate as I was watching the pornography.

I just finished watching the best of the best p*rn videos on the planet. Now there's nothing else to look for on p*rn sites again.

This was February 2019.

Porsche Still Offers The Single Greatest And Possibly Most Excessive Feature In All Of Automobiles - The Autopian

And these were just the act and not the mental and social problems associated with addiction.

All I knew was that, I couldn't masturbate without p*rn. I was first getting the urge to watch p*rn, while watching, I would now feel like masturbating.

Oh, and everyday I woke up tired 😫 I never slept early too. My mental health was nothing to write home about.

How to Make AI Faster and Smarter—With a Little Help from Physics - WIRED

Read that again ☝️

Remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

I remember sitting on the bed and smiling and that was when it hit me that I have successfully masturbated.

‘Knives Out 3’ Teaser: Daniel Craig’s ‘Wake Up Dead Man’ Sets December Release Date, Debuts Sinister First Footage - Variety

I don't know if all addictions are like this 🤔

I went there early in the morning trying to watch a movie and I found the CD inside the video player so I decided to watch what was on it and that was the beginning of the life I never wanted.

The harder I tried, the worse it became. I could get angry with myself and go about 3 days without it but when I relapse, I can do 3 in a day. And the subsequent days; it's just me getting drowned in the rabbit hole.

Why cant I feel anything in my sleep? I cannot even feel myself moving, breathing, and swallowing saliva! I cannot even hear anything, not even my alarm! Some people that I've been with says that I'm moving a lot in my sleep, how can I stop it?

Just keep trying

Do I wake up everyday with lots of energy? No but that's because I have a health problem, which is a story for another day.

I saw every girl or woman as a sex object including kid girls. There was no way I would look at a woman and not think of f*cking her.

What are the pros and cons of arranged marriages?

I did it in my room. I did it in my washroom. I did it in school in the washrooms.

No self esteem. No confidence. No ambition. Just dreams.

I got tired of always breaking the promises I made to myself.

4 things are making us sick, new MAHA documentary says. What the research says - CNN

I knew about masturbation but I didn't actually think of doing it but one day, on my bed when I was preparing to go to school I was watching pornography and something just came in mind; why don't you rob your dick with your hand?

There were times I could go 3 months without watching p*rn or masturbating but somehow I always came back to it.

But for me, I would say RUN away from it

Kuorans, what are some things unique to your country?

I know some people masturbate and they don't have the problems I went through.

I didn't even start counting the days because I didn't really believe I would get this far.

RUN 🏃‍♂️ for your dear life

Cardinals Place Jordan Walker On 10-Day IL, Select Ryan Vilade - MLB Trade Rumors

But how was I going to do it when everything I knew wasn't working? I didn't know

So all I had to do was to find a way to trick my dirty brain to think that p*rn isn't nice.

A couple of months later I started hating it and regretting after every session. Yet, I couldn't stop.

Have I stopped seeing girls as sex objects? Not entirely, I still want to f*ck some of them.

I went on my favourite site and started scrolling through my favourite categories; petite girls, sleeping girls, Japanese girls, Japanese mom, Japanese wife, massage, forced, in the bus, gangb*ng, Muslim girls, ebony, student and teacher, in the classroom, curvy, African, etc

There were times I was counting the days when I'm clean. But now I don't, because I got tired of counting and relapsing and starting all over again.

I always wished they would sit inappropriately or the wind would blow up their dress so I can see things.

Now I don't wait to be talked to before I respond. I talk when I think I'm supposed to.

Am I totally free? I don't know 😕

I did it while watching my sister. I did it while touching my sister 😭 I did it while watching my landlord's daughter.

I knew something had to be done about my wasting existence because if nothing changes, then nothing changes.

It took me days to finish watching them. Finally I decided to go to the washroom to do The Last Fap.

It didn't feel great after ejaculating but hey, who cares about feelings?

Was quitting worth the effort? At least for my mental health, it's a billion times worth it.

I started rubbing it and I liked how I was feeling so I kept on doing it faster and EUREKA, sperms came out of my dick.

I so badly wanted to f*uk a girl, yet I was so shy of girls. I never wanted to meet anyone. I always wanted to hide behind the phone and text.

So I'm still hanging on this lie.

I remember I once did it in my classroom at dawn. I did it in the hospital's washrooms. I did it in the lab where I work; both daytime and midnight.

And I can also talk to them now.